When you consider fighting with the cellophane wrapper on your bag of potato chips as exercise!!
When you turn on the TV, crawl into bed and watch 3 hours of wrestling because the remote control is on the other side of the room!!
When you don't move away from the curb, even after a truck splashes you!!
When it's too much trouble to get your umbrella out of your car during a sudden downpour!!
When YOU COUNT YOUR ANXIETY ATTACKS AS WORKOUTS!!
When you pause the exercise tape 90 seconds into the warm-up to have a cigarette.
When you watch "The People's court" and yell, "Hang'em both!!"
When you list all the things you could have done with the money you spent on therapy!!
When you watch golf on TV!!
When you hate New Year's Eve!!
When getting the mail is one of the highlights of your day!!
When your dog falls asleep while you're talking to him!!
When you spend more than 20 seconds considering whether Elvis is actually dead!!
When you take your cat's aloof behavior personally!!
When you have a choice between a blind date and a nap, and you choose the nap!!
When staying up all night is no longer cool!!
When your idea of a vacation is to plunk yourself down in one place and not budge for a week!!
When overnight, that amusing streak at your temple turns into gray hair!!
When you find yourself counting the years till you can join AARP!!
When you start bringing lawn chairs to outdoor concerts!!
When life insurance starts making sense!!
When you read the fine print..........If you can see it!!
When it takes 3 days to recover from raking leaves!!
When you can nap at will!!
When your arms aren't long enough to keep the newspaper in focus!!
When people start warning you about shoveling snow!!
When your computer has more memory than you do!!
When the only person who writes to you is Ed McMahon!!
When the person next to you on the train falls asleep on your shoulder and you consider it a first date!!
When you think the dog is scratching at the door because he wants to go out, but he wants you to go out!!
When you're approved for a credit card with a $20 spending limit!!
When you stop buying clothes and start buying power tools!!
When you call an 800 party line and no one will talk to you!!